Monday 2:29pm: Peter's out of the office so we turn the Man United vs. Man City game on the big newsroom TV that hangs over our cubicles and wish we were European.

Monday 2:31pm: An intern who shall remain nameless extracts a People Magazine pull-out poster of celebrity women entitled "Beauty at Every Age" and hangs it in Peter's cubicle.

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NPR

Tuesday 11:53am: All the potentially funny news stories I've found so far today have either been retracted or discredited by now.

Tuesday 3:20pm:

Ian: Does anyone know Vladimir Putin's middle name?

Peter: Yeah, it's "The."

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The Four Courser.

NPR

The Four Courser.

People sometimes ask if restaurants ever send us sandwiches to eat on Sandwich Monday. That would be a huge breach of ethics, but no, it doesn't happen often, which is a shame because we like sandwiches way more than ethics.

This week the Travel Channel sent us a sandwich called "The Four Courser" from 50/Fifty in Chicago, for something they're promoting. It's:

Hand-pulled pork shoulder, gouda bechamel, fried jalapenos, potato chips, and a mac and cheese stuffed waffle.

Ian: As promotional items go, this is tastier than the bucket of chum Discovery Channel sent us for Shark Week.

Peter: I enjoyed the screaming New Jersey housewife Bravo sent us. Because she also brought waffles.

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That's a really big sandwich.

Peter Sagal

That's a really big sandwich.

I happened to visit Portland, OR and somebody on Twitter told me I needed to go get a sandwich at Big Ass Sandwiches, a new foodcart in the Foodcart Archipelago of downtown Portland. Since (A) I do everything I'm told to do by Twitter, and (B) I was hungry, off I went.

I was greeted and, somewhat strangely, instantly recognized by Lisa Wood, co-proprietor with her husband Brian. This was somewhat strange because I am in radio, and thus my face is not well know, and hadn't even really said anything other than "Hello." So be assured: your Big Ass Sandwich will come dripping with extra NPR-geekery.

Over the weekend, I attended the White House Correspondents Association Dinner as part of the NPR contingent. On Saturday morning, before the party, I went to Walter Reed Hospital in Bethesda to visit with some wounded soldiers and marines, and I wrote up my experience here.

Barry Sonnenfeld

According to Barry, the hat and scarf were a gift from Emma Thompson.

Our guest this week, movie director Barry Sonnenfeld, is often photographed wearing a cowboy hat and boots. And when we asked him about this penchant for western gear, he revealed he also directs all his movies atop a saddle on wheels. He sent us proof.

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Several Peeps were harmed during the creation of this blog post.

NPR

Several Peeps were harmed during the creation of this blog post.

Monday, April 9^th

12:34pm: Planning Meeting. The show's going on the road to Boston this week. I bop my head and sing "Dirty Water" until I realize the rest of the staff is from Texas, Minnesota, Illinois, and West Virginia and they're giving me weird looks / don't appreciate the significance of that song.

12:40pm: Emily goes over the itinerary for the trip. While she focuses on important stuff like making sure the host and producers make their flights, everyone else spends most of their time discussing what they want to eat for dinner tomorrow night. Whether they end up getting Pad Thai, chowder, hamburgers, seafood, pierogies, beef paprikash, stroganoff, or wellington, no one can say they don't have their priorities straight.

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djwtwo/Flickr

Our friends at member stations WUSF in Tampa and WLRN in Miami are having a bit of a spat over which city can claim the real Cuban sandwich. No matter where you are, you can read their arguments over at NPR's Salt blog, and vote for your choice.

We don't have a dog in this fight, but we do ask both stations to email us a dozen Cuban sandwiches right now so we can be informed voters.

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Click to play!

Kongregate

Click to play!

What: i saw her standing there

A classic tale of Romeo-and-Juliet-style forbidden love: boy loves girl, girl loves boy, but boy can't have girl because girl is zombie. Every time boy tries to give girl hug, girl eats boy's brains. We've all been there.

Boy comes up with solution: put girl in cage, where he can admire her from afar but still live out normal lifespan. Everyone is happy, except girl, who's getting very hungry. Play on to find out what happens in the end!

Gamplay: Left/Right arrows to move, space bar to shoot zombie gun, fat fingers to lose game.

Takeaway Lesson: Don't actually put your girlfriend in a cage.

NPR

Warning: Object is as orange as it appears.

What is the noun is for the substance of which Doritos is made? We all know a Dorito is a triangular corn chip covered with orange flavor dust, but what is it made of? Is the essential substance of a Dorito "Dorito," or "Dorito Sheetrock ," or "highly processed fried corn meal infused with sugar, orange food dye, and glue?" Whatever it is, Taco Bell's new "Dorito Loco" comes in a taco shell made of it. We tried the Dorito Loco Supreme, which costs 30 cents more but you're worth it. (What do you get for that extra 30 cents? Thirty pennies added to each taco, for crunch.)

NPR

Should we be nervous this taco comes in a cast?

Mike: This is good.Like really good nachos!

Eva: Everything about this is disgusting, and I love it.

Peter: I don't like it. I open my mouth and take a breath before biting it, and get a lungful of powder. It's part taco, part asthma inhaler.

Eva: Dorito's orange powder: The fat man's cocaine.

NPR

Proof you can eat the Dorito Loco and still look dainty.

Peter: Next time somebody thinks they've hit bottom, they should ask themselves, "Sure, I've lost my job and my spouse, but am I eating a Dorito Supreme? No? Then party on."

Eva: Just like with regular Doritos, you can't eat just one. Which must be why I just absent-mindedly ate 23 tacos.

Mike: This is the perfect combination of two things that are terrible for you. As if ammonia and hydrochloric acid, mixed together ,tasted like chocolate.

(Eva is offered another.)

Eva: No thanks. I ate the first one, but now I feel really bad about it.

Mike: Exactly. I'm trying to find an analogy, for something you do, but don't enjoy. It's like shooting Lenny at the end of "Of Mice and Men."

Peter: Think of the tacos, Lenny! Think of the Tacos!

[The verdict: If you like Doritos, in all their orangey glory, you will like these, but just a little while later you will regret everything you've done to lead you to that moment.]

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Bao in a box.

NPR

Bao in a box.

Steam has changed all of our lives for the better. The steam engine changed history (it allowed Marty McFly to return to the present in Back To The Future III). Without steam, saunas would just be a bunch of naked guys in a room. And most importantly, steam makes bao possible.

We visited the Chicago chain Wow Bao (it rhymes) (warning, their website has an autoplay video).

Ian: It's like a cloud. I wish actual clouds were filled with pork. Because you know, pork rain.

Robert: Every cloud has a damaged stomach lining.

[Hi. I'm Kate the "Wait, Wait" intern and this is a new section of our blog where I'll be reporting on the latest happenings around the office every week. You may recognize me from other "Wait, Wait" blog posts, most notably the March 9-10th "What's a Beaver-Bear Mascot Doing in the Workplace?" promo video in which my unsteady camera work became a popular point of online discourse.]

MONDAY 4:23pm: Ian plays Kenny G.'s classic, "Silhouette," at his desk for the fifth time today. He keeps alternating the volume so that the soft harmonies gradually creep in and take over the office before the rest of us begin to realize why we feel so sensual.

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We apologize to those of you with Sandwich Monday HD.

NPR

We apologize to those of you with Sandwich Monday HD.

Major League Baseball stadiums have so many treats to offer: hot dogs, hamburgers, nachos, Human Growth Hormone. Just in time for Opening Day, Poag Mahone's in Chicago has combined three out of four of those in the Ballpark Burger: a hot dog topped hamburger, with a side of nachos.

Mike: This is a fine duet. It's like Dolly Parton and Kenny Rogers doing Islands in the Stream.

Ian: What part of the Kenny Rogers does this meat come from?

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Giving the Devil a bad name.

NPR

Giving the Devil a bad name.

You can do just about anything with Cadbury Creme Eggs, short of sitting on them until they hatch (we tried, it was a bad idea). There's Cadbury Creme Eggs Benedict, Cadbury Creme Egg Lady Gaga Transporter, and Deviled Cadbury Creme Eggs, which we tried a version of here.

Eva: This is a good eggsample of something delicious.

Ian: Yeah, eggs-cellent! I can't feel my eggs-tremities!